QC Freeze Press: 'Josh Has A Problem'

Quebec City Piglets second baseman Josh Barfield (left, clearly stoned) has been having a horrible season and was recently released by the Piglets. But is there more to this story than meets the snout?


'Josh has a Problem'
by Alexander Alejandro Marquez, Quebec Freeze Press

Thursday was a tumultuous day in and around the offices of the Quebec City Piglets. As the team fights to extend its season, numerous rumors have been popping up regarding one of the team’s once-shining stars, second baseman Josh Barfield. Reports started pouring in on Wednesday evening that Piglet GM Pat Renaud was agonizing over whether or not to follow the suggestion of Piglet Manager Brian Fantana to cut Barfield over allegations of drug use.
Barfield, a former 2nd round draft pick in the inaugural EHCC minor league draft, had had such whispers grow to a dull roar in the Piglet locker room in recent weeks, eventually leading to Luis Castillo making a second go-round in a Piglet uniform after a failed stint two years ago. Castillo’s signing and Barfield’s continued poor performance left Fantana no other choice but to let Barfield rot on the bench amidst a tight Division title race, as well as a battle for a playoff spot.
“Josh just wasn’t getting it done,” Fantana was quoted as saying this morning. “The bottom line is, we need guys who are going to perform here, and we can’t have guys just going out there and putting up oh for fours every goddanged night.” When asked about rumors of drug abuse by Barfield, Fantana responded with a terse “no comment.”
Pat Renaud was a bit more forthcoming. “Josh has a problem,” the long-time Piglets architect said. “We needed to look out for Josh’s best interests as well as the team’s. Josh needs help that he just can’t get inside a clubhouse night in and night out, especially in the middle of a pennant race. We still plan to stay in close contact with Josh and get him the help he needs. We’re even paying for his treatment, despite the fact that he’s no longer on the active payroll. We care about Josh and we want him to get better. When that time comes, he’ll be welcomed back to the clubhouse with open arms.”
But what if that time doesn’t come? Barfield’s problems seem to stretch far beyond those of normal baseball maladies. While Renaud wouldn’t address the problem specifically, saying “These matters need to be handled delicately, and we’d like to respect Josh’s privacy in his time of need,” it’s clear that Barfield’s problems go beyond his anemic .243 batting average and paltry 3 homeruns. A new batting stance doesn’t sound like the solution.
“Josh has an addiction,” one anonymous member of the clubhouse staff was quoted as saying. “The man loves Cheese Doodles. Loves ‘em. He can’t stop eating them. Sometimes, when the rest of the team is taking batting practice, Josh would be in the clubhouse crushing up cheesy puffs and straightening them into lines with a razor before snorting them up and then rubbing the excess on his teeth. You could always tell what he was up to, because he’d have a little orange trail on his nose and teeth. He didn’t think anyone noticed though. It was embarrassing for him. It was embarrassing for everyone.”
Eventually, Barfield’s problem extended onto the field. “Yeah, I saw him shoving a doodle up his nose in the field one time,” a Piglet who wished to remain anonymous was quoted as saying. “Andrew [Miller] was meeting with Russ [Martin] on the mound, discussing the next pitch, and, I don’t know, I guess he thought no one was looking or something, because he did it right out in the open, you know? Just shoved it up his nose and snorted like there was no tomorrow.” The problem has upset many in the Piglet locker room, forcing the issue to come to a head with Fantana’s suggestion that Renaud make the problem disappear from the clubhouse.
“We’re out there busting our asses every goddamned night,” said one Piglets player. “I mean, look at these guys. [Justin] Morneau broke his damn nose and was back the next day. Martin never misses a game, and he’s the friggin’ catcher! You’re telling me these guys who bust their ass every night for this team need to put up with this guy’s crap? That’s ridiculous. I’ll take Luis any day. At least he hustles.”
While the players seem to have made up their mind on the situation, Renaud is more open.
“Josh is our guy. He’s always been our guy, he’ll always be our guy. We want him to take care of this problem, confront it head on, defeat it like the champion he is, and come back to the team with a renewed confidence.”
That however, might not be possible. As EHCC rules prohibit using a disabled list spot for drug addictions, Renaud was forced to cut Barfield outright, even while the team cares for his medical bills during his absence. Technically, this means that any other team can swoop in and claim Barfield for their own. Many overtures have already been made to Barfield, with one division rival even claiming him for their own last year before he’d played an inning with the Piglets. While his putrid season and personal problems will be off-putting for some, others are already licking their chops to gain a piece of the damaged goods.
“I can’t wait for his waiver period to end,” claimed one rival GM. “He’ll look awfully nice alongside some of our other failed Piglet prospects. We’ve made a nice little living out of snatching the players they’ve dropped.” When asked about Barfield’s purported drug problem, the GM scoffed. “We’ve got plenty of cheese doodles in the clubhouse. I think he’ll be quite happy here.”
When these comments were relayed to Renaud, he was understandably upset and disappointed. With a heavy sigh, he said, “You’d hope it wouldn’t come to that, but some people in this league…well, they don’t have morals. To not only claim Josh away from us, but to encourage and exploit a problem for personal gain? That’s sub-human. I’d hope that’s just talk and not an actual course of action. It’s despicable to think someone would take advantage of both Josh and our organization when all we’re trying to do is get him the help he needs. It’s sad.”
And with that, Renaud ended the interview.
Where Barfield will end up is anybody’s guess. Both the Piglet fans and front office are hoping for a full recovery and return to Piglet Royal Blue, but with the dearth of quality second basemen in the league, it’s quite possible some scumbag will swoop in and ruin Barfield’s career—and, quite possibly, life—before our very eyes. Only time will tell. Until then, everyone here at the Quebec Freeze Press wishes Josh the very best, and a speedy recovery.

Alexander Alejandro Marquez is the Piglet Beat Writer for the QC Freeze Press. He once urinated on tobacco field because, “I hate those damn green monsters. Plus, I was drunk and had to pee wicked bad.”