State of the Peoria Cardinals

We’re into the seventh week of baseball and the Peoria Cardinals have shown little to no signs of life in the standings thus far this season. Sporting a league worst record of 14-40-6, Peoria fans have had very little to cheer about on the field this year. However, Peoria’s front office has been hard at work this season building for the coming years.


So far this season the Cardinals have signed 24-year-old Jhonny Peralta (8HR, 28RBI), 27-year-old Dan Johnson (.385, 4HR, 13RBI), and top Major League catching prospect, 22-year-old Jarrod Saltalamacchia. These players help sure up a young nucleus that already includes such rising stars as 22-year-old Ryan Zimmerman, 24 year old Robinson Cano, 26-year-old Chris Duncan, and 24 year old Ian Kinsler. With 22-year-old prospect Matt Kemp eager to contribute at the EHCC level. The Cardinals offense has been nothing short of atrocious this season, but with this influx of young talent Peoria fans do have reason for optimism in the coming years.

Pitching on the other hand has been the one bright spot for the franchise this season. Led by a handful of good-looking pitchers under the age of 30, Peoria has been putting up very competitive pitching stats. Cole Hamels, Chris Young, Chris Capuano, Chuck James, and Jason Bergmann make up a formidable front five, who, for the most part, have yet to reach their prime. Additionally, Peoria has had by far the best bullpen in the league. Led by Jon Papelbon and Francisco Cordero, the Cardinals have racked up 45 saves, 10 more than the next best team. With Peoria having absolutely no chance at sniffing the playoffs this season, the Cardinals will look to trade closers Todd Jones and Al Reyes by the deadline as well as potentially other veterans.

With this team being pitching dominant, Peoria will look to sure up some offense before the deadline and certainly during the 07/08 off-season. Look for slow improvements out of the Peoria Cardinals camp as GM Dave Grubb was recently quoted as saying, “this lackluster play is unacceptable and we will be doing what we can to move this franchise into another direction. With the young core of this organization it will take a little time, unfortunately we can’t jump from 12th to playoff contenders over night. Baby steps.”

Read more!

EHSPN: Panic Sets In...

Rich Harden was recently named the DL Queen, but he leads a band of injured aces on the Green Monsters disabled list.



Panic Sets in...
By EhSPN

Winston Salem, NC - Panic sets in in Winston Salem as the Green Monsters have yet to solidify a pitching rotation because of injuries. The injury bug has hit on many of their pitchers including Kenny Rogers, Rich Harden, Francisco Liriano, and Gustavo Chacin.

After pitching 5 innings of hitless ball, SP Shawn Hill went down with a sore shoulder only expecting to hit the DL as well. Hill said he's "99 percent sure" he will go on the disabled list, according to the Associated Press. He will have an MRI exam, Monday, May 14, and will be shut down for a week to 10 days, according to team doctor Ben Shaffer.

As for Chacin (shoulder), he threw off flat ground Saturday May 12th, however he is still three weeks from returning. He has been out since April 30, and it is likely he will not return until close to the end of the month.

Acquired via trade SP Rich Harden has also been injured since early in the season. As of April 16, he has been on the DL due to a right shoulder strain. He was seen throwing a side session earlier this week, but no details of when his return will be have been released.

With so many injuries on the pitching staff, look for the Monsters to seek the help of free agency. They have been weighing their options and have been leaning heavily on some of their less seasoned staff members.

Winston Salem's outspoken, and heralded ne'er-do-well GM Wally Bachman had this to say,

"I'm not really sure what we will do, but we're hoping the rehab programs work out and we can get some relief from some of our other guys who have been filling in for our downed heroes. We'll see where we go from here, and we hope that the grass is greener on the other side. But I'm pretty sure that once we get these guys going again, we'll be flying high, and achieving the goals we set out for the beginning of the year. You can't count us out, its a marathon not a sprint!"

Read more!

Baseball Tri-Weekly: May Cover

Read more!

EHSPN: What's in the Water in Vegas?

Las Vegas...casinos, wedding chapels, gambling, boxing, drinking, hookers...and a graveyard for once great players. What is going on in Vegas that is making players like David Wright play like David Wrong?


By Canadian von America
EhSPN

On another sunny afternoon in Las Vegas, Doggs third baseman David Wright was taking batting practice against the lovable team monkey, Ed. As the monkey threw meatball after meatball over the plate, Wright continually swung and missed, shaking his head after each whiff.

"I don't know...Ed's a pretty good pitcher," Wright said when asked to explain his batting practice woes. "I mean, you've seen him in that movie...Ed can play ball." Wright may be right about that, as Ed was the top rated monkey prospect for the Rockets (no affiliation the EHCC Rockets of Rakeville). In the minors, though, Ed played third base, and while he's been signed by the Doggs just to throw batting practice and eat left over bananas and Reese's Pieces in the clubhouse, rumors have been swirling that he's actually just biding his time until he can displace the slumping Wright.

"There's uh...no, um...truth to that, uh, particular rumor. No comment, I mean," said a bumbling GM Howe Dogg when asked about the rumor. Dogg was clearly caught off guard, and this can only help fuel the rumors that have been flying through every 2 bit casino in Vegas.

More important though, may be why this rumor has gotten started. Like other Dogg prospects before him, David Wright has fallen into a spiral of suckitude not seen in Vegas since Mark Prior. Since August of last season, Wright has hit a grand total of 4 homeruns, including exactly ZERO in 2007. He's hitting only .244 on the year with only 6 RBIs, and the fans of Vegas are in a panic.

Oddly enough, new acquisition Alfonso Soriano has also played like crap since joining the Doggs traveling sideshow. Soriano has also hit 0 homeruns and made David Wright look like an RBI machine, hitting exactly 1 RBI all season.

Also in a downward spiral since he arrived in Vegas a little over a year ago? Deposed Dogg closer Brad Lidge. The man brought in to replace him, Jason Frasor, has already blown a save chance in one of his first 3 outings, and is sporting an unimprssive 4.09 ERA. Of course, a 4.09 ERA looks positively dazzling when compared to fellow closer Mariano Rivera's 10.57 mark. Adding insult to injury, Vegas speedster Ichiro Suzuki has stolen only one base since joining the team in the offseason.

All the sucking has Las Vegas sitting uncomfortably in 7th place, and left fans in an unfamiliar position. "I just don't know," said season ticket holder Cat Mandu. "I really thought we'd be 10 games up in first place right now. Management seemed to do everything they could to build a winner, but guys seem to be sucking for no reason. I can't figure it out."

One fan has an idea what's causing the problems in Vegas. "Oliver Perez." Doggs long-distance fan Ootan McEhton from Montreal, Quebec provides further analysis. "It's definitely Perez, eh? He was here, eh? And he was really great, eh? Then he was traded to Quebec City, and we all know they're cursed, eh? So what think, is he went up there and then, when he was traded back, aboot this time last year, he brought some of the Piglet curse with him, eh? It took a little while for it to spread, but it's happening now. You're finding oot all aboot what people here in Montreal have known for some time, eh? It's the Piglet curse. Tough break for Vegas."

When asked if the curse is why he roots for Vegas instead of his hometown Piglets, McEhton replied, "Nah, that's noot it at ooll. Soory to say, but I just like a front-runner. I was all set to switch back to rooting for the Piglets after their off-season, eh, but they suck even worse than Vegas this year. Guess they're just showing that they can outcurse even their own curse, eh?"

If McEhton's theory holds true, the Doggs and their fans could be in for a long, long season. But maybe, just maybe, Ed the monkey can bring a little bit of that Ed magic to the Doggs--and cure David Wright of what ails him. But Mark Prior's fucked no matter what.

Canadian von America is a staff writer for Reuters. It was hard for him to write this article, partly because he doesn't speak English, but mostly because he thinks David Wright is so dreamy.

Read more!